sensingwithspirit.com Annielise Stone

Part 6 Acknowledging the Inner Child and trying to keep the peace.

When I think of the other parts of the Inner Child I realise that she it a part of me like eating sleeping and breathing. In some aspects a twin of my inner emotions not wanted to deal with at Child hood level because at the time not having the understanding or knowledge to actually recognising what she wants or needs. Again perhaps it’s a little of both.

Through out lives we are condition to do the right thing to know right from wrong and to be good and we will be rewarded. Even some religions state that our pecking order is judged on the acts of good deeds what we achieve in this time will set us in good faith for what is to come. Now this where it gets a little sticky because for a huge amount of people from every where in the world who don’t believe in parts of the important document then this don’t mean much.

A promise of finding something or someone that has been missing from their lives in a place where people describe of peace and tranquilly and light and love. So again they say the proof of the pudding is in the eating. Yet we all like different things and we all eat different things so our views and thoughts again of this can again be completely at odds with someone else.

I could really get deep with this but again that would take several hours of typing and lots of words and views and opinions on my part. So for now we all have our own views on the subject of God and Heaven. Some of us believe in reincarnation and some of us belief it don’t matter what you do or say when you’re dead your dead and that’s that.

Now this again gets a bit tricky for me because if it was the case when you’re dead your dead. I would not have been talking to the other side my whole life would I?

I would not have experience the things I have seen or felt and neither would anyone else who has these gifts. Neither would I been able to pass on accurate information to people I had never met give names dates and places not only in this country but in other parts of the world and some of them I could not even speak the language. But that is great because it shows, if something need saying a message gets there one way or another.

So back to the Inner child if we can understand her frustration her worries and her fears we are already half way to helping not only ourselves but our children if we recognise certain traits and behaviour patterns surely in time we wont over re act and learn we don’t have to be perfect to be loved or wanted. We just need to learn to love and accept ourselves for us. WARTS and ALL.

By learning to accept that we are who we are and that going on a sudden diet and starving ourselves is not going to work in the long run. The quick fix can only last as long as the tight under wear will let breathe with out crippling up in pain wearing black because we have read somewhere it makes us look thin and not wearing any strips because it don’t matter what the size you are its like drawing attention to the huge spot on your chin its going to get noticed. Like a huge beacon of light Saying look at me.

The inner child is a part of you if you can accept that your half way to accepting you. The magazines that imply that you have to have a certain look is fake just like half the pictures in it touched up with clever air brushing. Then thousand spent of false bits to make up for the bits that we think we need to look beautiful.

The famous quote beauty is seen by the eyes of the beholder. One mans drink is another mans poison. To be realistic again if your Dads short and your Mums short there a big chance your going to be short.

The famous DNA which makes us all unique is part also of our parents and their parents. That’s why some of us have blue eyes and our siblings can have green or brown eyes.

If everyone looked the same we end up forgetting who we are the zebra is black and white yet no too patterns are the same. A field of sheep which all appear to look the same are different each one with its own marks and personality. Twins can appear to be identical to a person who does not necessarily know them but again to a loved one they know who is who.

So my response to all of your you and your Inner Childs love them and treat them as you want to be treated listen to them allow them the odd strop and accept you for you. In the long run acceptance is the biggest part of acknowledgement and acknowledgement lets you grow move on and deal with all sorts of life’s little issues they throw at us.

Annielise Stone

Continuing the story of the inner child parts one to four can be also found on my website www.sensingwithspirit.com

Thanks Annielise

In previous posts about the Inner Child I have talked how we should try to have a relationship with our own inner child when we ignore her we suddenly find she has a cob and starts either the sulk or the plan to make us feel vulnerable insecure and threatened.

All these things are used by her to UN nerve us and throw us off balance. This leads to a second battle and the one I am talking about is the power struggle not only of your own inner child but even of someone else’s who decided to feed of you and her.

So all of a sudden there are two forces at work your own inner worries and third party of someone else’s personal issues.

Example: You get dragged into someone else’s friction you know it the two other people who have spent many months plotting and scheming against each other who seem to try and build up sides and armies and you trying to do your job suddenly finds yourself either on the end of it or bang right in the middle. They are every where work, college even at home.

You have spent all week trying to avoid situations and just plod along trying not to get on anyone’s nerves and here it is Friday and power struggle explodes. Next your inner child starts I told you so, I said you should not work with these types and you always end up with taking the blame. No only are you trying to work out who these other types are but already your head aches your stressed.

The weekends of to a brilliant start and already your dreading Monday morning for as sure eggs are eggs its some how going to be your fault even though you did your job followed the rules and still some how managed to come out with the dog poo on your shoes and it don’t matter, how many times you wash it off the smell wont go away.

What’s next! You ask yourself do you spend the whole weekend wondering if you going to get pulled in to explain your side and to be honest what side. Why should you even have to explain that you follow the policy laid down the rules and guidelines of!

Again the sun shiners the types it don’t matter what goes down they come up smelling of roses. Will have a fantastic weekend and their gloating Inner Childs have managed not only to have been fed and watered for another week they even have bonus points for upsetting yours.

Limit the damage try to explain to yourself first that your not alone you just feel like it. You’re not the only person in the world who feels that what ever they try to do it always seems to be wrong. Be careful of the sympathetic ear yes we all need to off load but don’t do it to news week again the report will get out of hand and in the end your will find yourself front page news and not for the right reasons.

Chocolate helps along with a nice hot bath play some of your favourite music or watch a good film. Learn to read the signs before they happen. Smile in most situations. The Inner Child loves her chocolate but not too much or we have the sick issues. Next try smiling it confuses people it also makes them wonder if they have actually achieved their goal.

To be honest you may feel like cr… But don’t show it. Suggestion: when in difficult situations answer question with a question.Then say sorry but I haven’t got all the information “Can I get back you Brad?” It gives you breathing space ok on insight you won’t remember it every time but like my old mum used to say for warned is for armed. I am sure she read is somewhere and its someone else famous quote in the end its good advice so have a better week Annielise Stone March 7^th 2010

The news that shook the world that the King of Pop was Dead.

Loosing Michael has hit the world by storm. We as humans spend most of our time, in our own little bubbles with our own insecurities worries and we rarely think about others unless it affects our way of life, or it becomes a topic of conversation. Through grief we stop and look at ourselves and realise, that perhaps we all can learn a lot from those who have left here but their ENERGY lives on.

I first wrote this article last year when I was approached by a couple of friends what I thought about him. Now months later his music has received a second life. Children as young 10 sing and dance and move to thriller and when given the chance can say what their favourite track is. Like Elvis his Music will be played and remember in new generations to come.

When you hear his music, when you watch his videos or interviews when you see just how much energy he gave that is not going to fade. The physical or hard shell presence is more harder to accept but if you listen hard enough, you do see you, remember you feel. A song comes into your head and its stays there. Our duty is to remember don’t they say “Less we forget”. I really don’t think anyone will.

Michael was our shooting star he was Michael he saw the world through the eyes of a child and for that often was misunderstood and his actions cost him dearly. I ask you look inside yourselves and find your own inner child and reflect.

They say the good die young and the reason often people give is that they try so hard to make others happy that their own needs and wants suffer because of it. I am not saying that he did not make some wrong or difficult choices and that we all live with the fact that we make mistakes. In the end to live a live of Peter perfect and be in a huge bubble or goldfish bowl makes us all a little strange.

I recently watched an old video of a film that Robin Williams portrayed as Jack a boy who was in a rush to get here and he had a condition that his body grew at rate 10 times faster than the average human. At 10 he was portrayed as a man in his late 30’s. This moving film set around the early 1980/90 it showed us that even if we look a little strange its inside that counts. The film brought awareness to the fact that some people bodies grow old and the brain still lives on. The Actor Bill Cosby played Jack’s Tutor and Educator and if you get the chance to see it there are some real humorous parts too.

My point when Jack is at his lowest point he tells him that he is a shooting star and if your lucky enough to see one you see just how beautiful bright and amazing they are.

They give everything they have they shine the brightest and shoot the straightest and explode into the Heavens.

For me and for all you other shooting stars out there to come and to go when you leave as you will explode into the heavens and remember that what you do makes a difference

Remember Michael for his music his love of the planet and his ability to see that our world was suffering long before few or we were prepare to admit.

Keep Shining MICHAEL. Annielise Stone Up dated April 1^st 2010

Diary of an Inner Child part 4 The Plotters and Schemers just waiting for the time when they can creep just when you not looking and…………………………

The inner child’s been quite for the past few days and you’re plodding along not really thinking about any thing in particular. It’s too cold to worry if the extra pounds, are creeping on due the mid week chocolate fix and boy it was Valentines Day, so you had to spoil yourself just in case any one else didn’t. You probably even sent yourself a card at sometime just to have one on the side to show the world someone loved you.

Its Easter next and already the chocolate you have secretly given up for lent. Your planning a huge fix when no ones looking. Dreaming Chocolate Bunnies and drooling like Homers after a do nut!

But ! In the back ground, the constant thought, the promise of listening and supporting the inner child it’s suddenly become easier to ignore her.  Why because she been watching she been looking and she knows the flaws. In the meantime someone’s, working someone, who would not  usually say Boo to a Goose has been plotting and scheming and under minding you, not only work but a so called friend who has always had the eye on a particular someone, something, position is at work also.

Then the out of the blue question comes “How are doing? How are things going? What do you feel?” Next you find that someone had said something and it’s so small your gob smacked and there you are defending yourself over something so trivial that you can’t believe what you just heard.

Do you talk to too much? Do you talk not enough are you a team player and slap the wind is taken straight out of your sails.

This situation is real its apart of every day whether its work home or personal watching, your back is a full time job and also listening to the Inner Child too because honestly we all get to complacent. We start to believe our own status and our own self importance.

So what do we do us fight back we pull up our socks stick out our chin and HIDE I KNOW! We are so out raged at the audacity of the situation we are stuck,we are struck we are so out raged we fail, with moving  forward. Once we lick our wounds, complain to the nearest sympatric ear we have to stop and put up a defense. The quite would not say boo to a ghost types are secret plotters and schemers and don’t you forget it. The old saying walls have ears means exactly that behind every success is someone who not only wants it but will try everything to get it. Am I cynical perhaps or just cautious because my inner child was actually warning me of this weeks ago but I was so full of my own importance, I forgot to listen?

So a week or so goes past ,you can’t make your mind up if the complain is genuine or if now you have inferiority complex, or perhaps a bit of both. You have spent nights going over the situation in your head and others say oh don’t worry let it go. Where? when deep down you know you’re the new guy even though you may have been there for ever.

Let’s face it. It’s not the first time. It may not be the last UN less you alters it. HOW.

Expectation what did you expect if you’re not confident in what you’re doing it will show they say bull Sh..te Baffles brains but to be fair you can only use so much of that before it bites you back. Don’t get complacent be prepared for the UN expected and realise you’re not alone. I follow the ABC plan Annielise view to surving almost any situation if A doesn’t work try B and if B doesn’t work try C. There are 26 options in my plans and if I run out of them I use A1 like my mum once said there are more that one way or catching a Rat you sometimes have to think like one. Like they say in the song Pick yourself up and Start all over again. Exits and Entry plan your routes like keeping a filo fax what to cubs and guides are prepared. You do have to realise that for some of us to keep going is to keep trying. Tip for the Day Smile Sweetly at the Emery it confuses them and their ego will think that they have won. But that’s where they are wrong we know better By Annielise Stone 19^th Feb 2010

“Communication is not just spoken word it’s a gesture a sign”. By Annielise Stone Internation Medium 13th Feb 2010 sensingwithspirit.com

Some days the Inner Child gets up earlier than you in fact she probably didn’t shut up at all, kept you awake half the night worrying about anything and everything, too numerous to mention and your too knackered to care.

You know it’s the sort of day you wake up with that huge spot or Zit on your chin no matter how much concealer you put on it. There it is for the whole world to see along with the fact, you can find any clean underwear and your favourite top has shrunk in the wash. Guess what the paper in the loo run out too!

From there the day seems to escalate at a speed faster than a landslide. You miss the bus, the train and you have run out of milk for that all important hot beverage TEA. You creep into work hoping that you can hide the fact you’re A) 15 minutes late, and B) the huge growth on your chin.

There she is waiting to pounce and the day is set. You have forgotten to take back the library books and the 3 DVD’s that you got thinking you have a you moment only to find you seen two before and the other one was complete utter rubbish to top it all your a day late and the fines mean you could have brought them cheaper.

So the lunch hour is spent trying to find the shortest cue and you end up with a cold coffee and dry sandwich because all the best ones are gone. The machine in the library is asking for the fines and wont let you take anything else out until you paid and finally you have forgotten your pin and can get any cash out for the bus home.

For some of us this is a too regular occurrence and you can guarantee your are continually going too put your foot in it.

One of my favourite sayings”Talks of the devil and it follows you up”. With all my good intentions to try and practise Karma even I have days. The inner child has her moments I am sure all of you have seen the cartoons with the devil on one shoulder and the Angel on the other and fighting both and usually the chocolate wins hands down.

Mind! You’re inner child needs attention love and lots of understanding making peace with her is a full time job but very worth while and when you work together. Both of you end up with a win win. Rather than win loose. (“I told you so”)

Today been a particularly difficult one it’s like don’t get too complacent and deep down recognise you cant please people all of the time in some cases you cant please some people at all. Realism recognises that as human beings we also have flaws and we do screw up all of us at sometime or another.

I have written over 70 blogs in the last couple of years and today my website decide it did not want to work or let anyone view my thoughts. Perhaps my own ego got in the way and I presumed that by talking about various subjects and opinions that I could reach a wider audience. I have met people from all over the world I have given readings to many different countries races and continents all of these people came from different back ground and I liked to think with my help they moved forward working through their own pathways. I always try to include humour in my blogs as without them the ability to make fun at ones own self would make me appear boring. I got told to today you like to talk. I do! should I have taken offence. Perhaps is it the case that I want to try give you some tools to help you work with life instead of against it.

My reply was also I can listen for if I had spent all my life talking how I would be able to provide so much information on so many subjects without having someone talk to me.

“Communication is not just spoken word it’s a gesture a sign”. By Annielise Stone sensingwithspirit.com

I watched an old film last night with Robin Williams and Robert De Nero in called the Awakening the story of a man who tried to help people who were affected by an illness which causes them to retreat into their own worlds making them completely dependant on others. For a short time drugs work to help these people but with all medicines we don’t know the side effects. The point was he learnt behind the drugs to reach people was human contact. Time, understanding and yes, talking which I do a great deal of.

As the story unfolds the line There is not such thing as a simple miracles expresses that we all need greater understanding of life itself. Annielise Stone 13^th Feb 2010

Diary of the Inner Child part 2 or in other words continuing the Journey of Self Acceptance by Annielise Stone 09 02 2010

I want this post to be a support and I want you to support it because if these remarks fit you just how many of us needs to work not necessarily on becoming super models but more and ground balance humans who can accept that you can make a difference

I first started this post last month when felt that the the winter blues had finally set in or was it the fact it was realised that the jeans you had brought just before Christmas now you cant even get one leg in let alone done up. That’s one of the great things about the cold weather you can hide under the jumpers and coat and woolly hats and pretend you have on loads of layers to hide the Christmas binge.

True there are those wonderful adverts saying do this and and in two weeks you can have a figure like mine. Plus here its too blooming cold to want to A exercise and B eat salad.

Now I do realize that not every country in the world is living in winter. I myself lived in New Zealand for 3 years and the summer months are the UK winter months which can get a little confusing at times. It is easier to want to eat less when you’re not cold.

Back to the plot the quick fixes don’t work neither, do the diets unless you have the time, will, power and determination to make it a career. All of you know someone who no matter what they eat never puts on a pound and others who look at chocolate and gain five pound. Have we all got to suffer and self loath ourselves just to fit the perfect mould.

Who says we have to be thin and who says what is redeemed to be fat a Uk size 10 to 12 was small and 14 to 16 medium anything bigger was large but that’s ok too because of height stature but now days its all about if your not a size 6 to 8 then your not in the in crowd. And anything over a size 12 and your huge. The catwalk models are beautiful women in their own right but also a woman should have curves and be proud of them.

What ever your size pressure is going to make you smaller because that is the image that is readily promoted today.

I want to help everyone take a second look at their inner child listen to what makes them happy balance out and find the middle ground. Heal the need to be something your not.

Years ago when Hollywood actors and actresses were on our screens it was black and white they had little gadgets and the films were made on budgets with most of them doing their own stunts. If you look back on the archives you will see people with big noses sticky out ears and laughter lines no boltox or computers to cleverly cover up the lumps and bumps. If one had a spot you saw it. Everyone knows the famous Christmas Song White Christmas Bing Crosby he had a large nose and big ears but that did not stop him doing what he loved best.

Owen Wilson is well known and popular Actor he has had his own issues with life and even being famous does have its draw backs. One of the important things was he does not have a perfect face he has charm but his nose is not perfect but its not immediately apparent that he has plastic surgery to improve its looks.

I again am trying to find ways to let you know what’s inside will effect how you act on the outside. For some people it won’t matter what they do to the outside they will still see that insecurity on the inside. It could be due to the fact of

Life conditioning from others emotional bullying, family issues relationship issues and even for some past life issues.

As this blog develops I want to look at ways to help heal that inner child for some it may be just a simple healing a visit back to the place inside and making peace.

Perhaps looking at a mediation to acknowledge and start the progress to recovery.

Annielise Stone Feb 2010

Day I think its Saturday Date January.

I cant remember they all feel the same.

Effort lost the plot reason to many to list and God why me?

The outer body or visible image we show the world is not always the true picture. We all walk around shielding our problems and fears and then wonder why they turn round and bite us.

The pressure to be a certain look the perfect weight and the ideal Head Girl/Boy follows all from childhood.

Do we all get to that point where we feel we deserve our fate?

How many have tried the Gok fix and failed. The how to look good naked and if I have a big bum don’t wear stripes. I am not criticising the programmes that trys to help with self esteem. For some lucky few this may be a short term fix and like the eating the last chocolate in the box and the feeling sick the attention, the intention soon disappears when the up keep is totally impossible on a budget and that includes time and motion.

Like a room that freshly painted it soon starts to mark and chip if you don’t keep it clean, tidy and untouched. That’s the point up keep of our bodies and lifestyles are so totally consuming it no wonder we often fail at the first post.

Lettuce anyone with a sense of humour will probably have seen Matt Lucas play Marjorie Doors who constantly takes pleasure from taking the Mickey out of others who again suffer with weight and self esteem issues. Ok its funny and yes us all need some light refreshment and those of you who again, watched the Telly when the famous PG monkeys on it will remember the phrase “Thank you most kindly Madam”. So you see I do have a sense of humour too!

My point is that Lettuce and Dust, for some people who are so desperate to fit in to make the mould to be in the in crowd are usually so sick of it that every day, adverts and images only adds to a sad soul and adds to depression and self loathing.

How many of you out there have spent nearly all their life trying to be perfect. Well sorry it aint just going to happen Fact. Unless you win the lottery and even then, the hours of painful surgery and diets and exercise leave you with an outer shell that looks what perfect and then define it. What is perfect for each of us it would be different.

They say beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder but what happens when what we see is not what we feel, hurt just doesn’t go away it needs understanding love encouragement and lots and lots of attention. So this inner child surfaces.

Why because this where it all starts even from that first day at school when some decides you fit the mould that your in with the In Crowd. You can see it almost in an instance even as early as the first mother and toddler group and you don’t have to be an expert to spot it.

Now another point is does the history of the mother’s inner child follow the child’s inner child are we set up to fail even before we start.

Simple you can fix the outside to look a certain way but that fix can soon become empty just like the purse runs out of money. Just like the hair cut that needs to be done every few weeks along with the colour and then what happens you get home from the experts and then guess what it never looks the same.

Now that is a statement its true and I can speak for all of you. Even a hairdresser cant do her own hair as all of us that tried to cut our own fringe in the mirror will know.

This is a long blog and I am not even half way through to get your attention first I want to realise that the human race has flaws its not perfect and very few people are content with their lot.

There is always going to be someone more Clever, better looking, thinner, younger, talented, smarter nicer, richer, healthy the list is endless

There is always going to be someone who is faster than you who wins everything from the girl to job and the car.

They say that like attracts like and I have seen it yet, when I speak to those people they too in turn complain that they haven’t got it easy and have flaws too.

What do they do, they hide it. Yet they still seem to win the first prize in the raffle and walk away with a gift they did not need and probably did not even want. They just cant help themselves.

To have a style and image takes work and lots of it. It’s a 24 hour a day 365 days a year and for most people it impossible.

A comparison would be an athlete training for the Olympics only to come last and then not only having to face your coach, family friends and country. You have to face yourself and say I failed. What is failure surely the fact he got there was important. But to Whom.

I say you may feel that you have failed today but you have not failed tomorrow you still have a choice and that is what makes us different from animals. A squirrel who spends the spring and summer collecting food for the winter know that if he don’t get enough food he go hungry and starve he might be lucky and get the odd left over but it’s his responsibility.

You may be thinking what has all this got to do with my inner child. First and foremost if you don’t love wants on the inside it don’t matter how much you change yourself the outside may look different to everyone else but it stays the same for you.

If you feel sad on the inside you can hide it for so long but it will surface and depression will set in. The factors are numerous and each point can have a completely different trigger. I once picked up a book it said 300 reasons to be depressed I thought great I could read this and find a few more.

Even different types of medication can improve or even make the conditions worse. Then there is the Season condition where the lack of sunlight and bright colours makes us feel like cr…p.

Yep the good old weather does make or break our day. So proven there are probably more happy contented good looking people in the shinny countries then in a place when it pees down with rain wind and hail 70% of the time. Yet another, reason to make us feel that the world and its army are against us.

So I have come to the part where how do we deal with it?

What you may ask if I have spent money on the outside why is the inside not happy, why I have suddenly not become this perfect person they told I could be. I have watched all the films I have read all the books I have spent hours eating lettuce and starving myself and looking at web pages of chocolate cake and drooling at the images on screen and yet I still have put on weight.  For What ! to find that I am just as UN happy, just as miserable and I am just as fed up and I still feel sh…

I have the gym membership but instead of feeling motivated I feel deflated I braved it once then the local stick insect came along with the perfect body the perfect hair style and the perfect job waltz in speaks a very loud voice to the instructor “Can we work on our stomach”! mines such a problem area and you look at them think what the …… get real. So motivation goes out of the window you reach for the chocolate or the large glass of wine and wonder what next is to come months of staving yourself to get into those perfect jeans to find in one mouthful of chocolate its caused the flood gates to open tears frustration hatred self loathing.

The punishment begins you get up the next morning and relate to Dawn French as you find you not only fallen of the wagon but you have also ate the wagon train itself. The face looks like a kids’ join the dots page and you can’t even get your bum into old favourites let alone anything half reasonable that you can wear to the supermarket you decide do you fake an illness or can you phone in and say that Granny lost her cat.

The fact is the plot has gone, the effort has gone and your back looking and wondering why you. What did you do to deserve this? They said things would change if you stayed on track and yet you’re back to square one.

I can say that self love is the first steps to recovery it don’t happen overnight and you will fall off the band wagon regularly. I know I have seen it there are no quick fixes and even the tightest knickers still can only hid the lumps and bumps on the outside.

On the outside you may have reached the perfect size * but on the inside you still feel 4 times bigger and your waiting for this little gremlin to tell you I told you so I told you your not……………………………… and the list goes on.

This post is not just about weight its about you and the fears and worries put on you by others, who in your life time took great pleasure at taunting, you putting, you down and making you feel worthless.

I want this post to be a support and I want you to support it because if these remarks fit you just how many of us needs to work not necessarily on becoming super models but more and ground balance humans who can accept that you can make a difference.

I plan to write more on this subject and some ideas on how we can help take you forward and the start of the journey to heal your inner child

Annielise Stone International Medium January 23^rd 2010